the losing syndrome

today is going to be SO much better than yesterday... and the picture above is one of the signs. the above picture has been "lost" for several months. i was looking for it one day, preparing for an upload to print, and it was gone. i conducted several searches of the computer trying to find and finally, despairly, resigned to the fact that it was gone, that somehow it had been deleted or destroyed and lost forever. i tried not to think about it, but it was hard, especially when i was scrapbooking this day in Yosi's album. i really grieved, b/c this is the ONLY picture we have of us with yolanda and alma, yosi's foster family. we have pictures of them with yosi, before we met her, and those are important, but THIS picture, from THAT day, it's... well, crucial. if it had always been in my possession i would have waited to post it on "gotcha day" anniversary. but it was lost and today it is found, so i am celebrating early! david found it EARLY this morning while i was still in bed dozing. don't know what made him look (probably the work on his book) but it doesn't really matter. i was astounded when he showed it to me. apparently it had been there the whole time, hiding between pictures in a bizarre computer blurp.

another thing was lost recently, causing me to despair- puppy (y's holding it in the picture above). january, the snow leopard, has been a faithful and trusted stand in, but she started asking where puppy was yesterday morning, so i knew SOMEthing must be done. up till then i'd just been "keeping an eye out" for him. Having reviewd all the circumstances of his disappearance, i was 99% certain he was in the house, somewhere, but after 5 days and no sign of hide nor hair, i was starting to have some gut-wrenching doubts, imagining him outside dirty and ragged, or worse, stolen, never to be recovered.
yesterday evening, i conducted an official search. i finally found him, in the place i should've looked first: in the cupboard, under the "secretary" desk, where yosi likes to "hide". she must've hidden puppy down there while i was getting ready for work. sort of anticlimactic, i know. just goes to show how bad i have this disease of misplacing things.

yesterday was royally crummy, in part b/c i had left my purse @ church. earlier last week my keys went "missing", later i discovered they were in my purse the ENTIRE 24 hrs (just not in the pocket i usually put them in). on good days, this is hilarious, on middling days it's humilating, on bad days, it makes me want to destroy something, specifically, my brain. i'm sure you'll have all kinds of good advice, and i'm sure it works. but i can't seem to consistently follow it. that's life. that's me. i'll just have to suffer. just pray i don't lose something TERRIBLY important.

show's over.